Posts Tagged ‘ thoughts ’

How to Pick Your Nose in Public

Nose Picker

You wake up in the morning from a comfortable night’s rest and after a yawn your nose starts to itch. You take one of your digits and shove it in the nasal cavity without second thought, retract it back, and flick the green substance in the air like a tiny cannonball.

We pick our noses (defined by “the insertion of a finger (or other object) into the nose with the intention of removing dried nasal secretions” from our good friend Wikipedia), it’s only a natural habit that was adopted at birth and largely taboo. As much as we hate to admit it we do it whenever and wherever we find the need to, regardless of how gross, disgusting, or pleasantly entertaining it is. Due to harsh criticism by pompous aristocrats, society frowns upon the infamous activity, restricting us from acquiring clean nostrils in public.

So how can we successfully pick our schnoz in around others without compromising our reputations?
There are many ways and among them are:

  • The Sleeper– You fake a few eye drifters and adjust yourself in a more comfortable position. Moments later you lay your head down on top of your arms and slide one of your hands underneath, giving you a discrete, effective way of extracting the dried mucus.
  • The Ninja– You’re touring your favorite department store and all of a sudden your sniffer begins to twitch. People are more present than 12-o’-clock at McDonald’s and the goal is mandatory; without hesitation you walk to the clothing department and cautiously slip into one of the racks, where everything can be achieved in one go. Beware of cameras.
  • The Chronic Cougher– Better practiced with a hoodie or jacket, when duty calls begin with a quiet little cough, followed by a more profound hack with a few chest beatings. Then start the heavy coughing and hide your head behind jacket/hoodie, continuing the cough while loosening the abominable boogers.
  • The Cover-Upper- Hospitals or doctor offices are as busy as subways most of the time and nose-picking witnesses with a possible staph infection are prone to puking, initiating a chain reaction of undigested lunches being spilled. Prevent this by taking a magazine, immersing yourself in its pages, and tickling your olfactory nerves judiciously.
  •  The Rocketeer- This technique has an increased chance of nosebleeds (therefore definitely not recommended for those who have long fingernails) which involves attentively scanning the area for individuals looking in your immediate direction–when the coast is clear–quickly shove your finger or thumb up your nose, perform a twisting scoop, then remove it and drive it into your pocket before they anyone could blink.
  • The Aristocrat- The most uncommon of ways involve expending patience as you wait for the opportunity to enter a private room and use a tissue to blow the slime out without sacrificing the cleanliness of your hand. Something to consider if you plan on shaking hands.

Weither you flick-it or wipe-it, these techniques will save lots of blushing, ridicule, disgusted looks, eyebrow raises, and shame. As a relation to the content of this post, remember…

“You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose”.

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Update Of Unrivaled Precedence

“Because things are the way they are, things will not stay the way they are. “
~Bertold Brecht

My blog has gone through several renditions throughout its existence, the format for Blogger was too loose for my taste, but allowed expressive creativity. The community that Blogger had was one that limited full publicity for a new-comer such as myself and the only way to get any kind was to advertise the living heck out of it. (It’s inanimate, I know…)

WordPress was the golden ticket into getting others to even take a slight glimpse of what I had to say. The community was rich, full of new to tenured Bloggers that would give their time to read the vast number of posts solely for the support they would want to have. The format was rich, smooth, and easy to use and by the time I was done with the registration I was too antsy to publish it.

The theme was cool, but it felt as if I was missing an important detail…

So I decided that perhaps it was time to clean-out the old layout and update the face of Better With A pen. I’m here to ask–which one of these snazzy themes would look best for my blog?

Time for Virtual Party Hats v3

It’s that time again; the time to slap on those party hats, burst open that confetti, and increase those chances of dying from a sugar overdose. Ever since our last celebration (in which we witnessed the spotlight of the most popular post ever, lots of applause, and empty promises) a lot has happened such as some more crazy posts (as usual), a fellow writer that joined the wonderful WordPress community, and a depressing move from an occupational department to another less interesting one.

Besides that there is one thing that is more paramount than anything else…

That means People from all over wasted took their time to read the contents of my blog 5,000 times! A milestone worthy of an achievement.

…Okay, perhaps not…

But what does deserves one is my short story “Steamship Billy” who won an Honorable Mention in the TDG Create a World Writing Contest. Now it may not seem like a big deal–“Oooo, you got a picture with some girly flowers on it.”–but it’s the first time my writing has received any kind of recognition, and even though I came close to third, it’s worth it all.

So, what will you see in the upcoming months?

  • More short stories
  • More GIF’s of supreme hilarity
  • Additional Blogroll victims friends
  • A new layout and theme
  • More postsYou Don't Say

Perhaps the next party will celebrate a Freshly Pressed or our next milestone of 10,000 views. Then again I would like to thank all my friends, followers, and guests that have given feedback and read what I had to say.

I wonder what could be the reason in so much popularity…

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A Picture Worth A Thousand Gamerscore

Waiting for the debut of Halo 4 can be unnerving for some (Okay, perhaps all of us.) and the amount of info we have been granted to see makes it even worse.
Now, courtesy of leak site AllGamesBeta, our eyes can once again feast on more conceptual screenshots that make us delve into this mystery that Halo 4 has hidden itself behind. The first one shows Master Chief talking to his AI Cortana; a few others gives us some contemporary idea of how the multiplayer will be like with some sweet action shots while the rest show concept art and early game footage.

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Crisp, clean HUD. Nice.

Forerunner?

Imma' kick ya'...in the butt.

The Covenant is definitely going to appear again; their role: Unknown

It’s absolutely beautiful I must say, the game has some potential to become the best looking Halo anything ever crafted (except when they make Halo 5 for the “Durango”), even though graphics play a large part of the game we seem to be more concerned about how we will play the same. New features are in the talks and some of us are worried. Now don’t get me wrong, we have been playing what is seems like the same game over and over again with new engines and armor pieces (mind that I am excluding Halo: Reach from this), perhaps it would be a good idea to mix things around a bit; not totally stripping it and disregarding the original, but add the new features in (and make it work) to make it feel new and fresh.
343 Industries is doing a heck of a job to give us what we want and many people believe it or not would be absolutely surprised if they messed it up. We have faith in you Frank O’Connor–make us proud.

*Pictures courtesy of AllGamesBeta, EGM, and Google Images.

Delayed Review: The Dark Knight

How can I resist speaking about the best movie that I have ever seen? the problem lies in that very statement, I can’t. Now for those of you who have seen The Godfather and profess that the movie is the best ever produced for our eyes to feast upon, I can’t say the same. Perhaps because I have never seen any of the Godfathers, regardless The dark Knight is a hardy meal of it’s own that leaves my stuffed (in some theoretical manner that is not meant as a pleasantry).

Since I have never seen Batman Begins (funny story how that happened; I was in a drive-in theater and we were to watch that and Sharkboy and lavagirl as a package deal. I disagreed and pleaded with my parents that perhaps it was the wrong time, but they insisted and we were off. If I have to decree what would be the most ridiculous movie ever it would be Sharkboy and lavagirl. My eyes became heavy with bordom and as soon as the credits rolled I was asleep. Later did I know that I slept through Batman Begins and my hatred for Taylor lautner began years before Twilight…)

Back to my review…

The Batman reboot that Christopher Nolan took under his graceful wing was dark and realistic, something that the past movies failed to achieve, except for the first one directed by Tim Burton. Close, but no cigar.
Not like the previous movies were trying to hit that mark, but nothing can do what Christopher Nolan did. Batman, The Joker, Harvey Dent were all more tangible and believable than any superhero movie made, Gotham City could have been hidden on the U.S. map for all we (don’t) know. The Batmobile also received a make-over, setting the famed vehicle’s Kick-but meter to an impressive all-time high.

Most and foremost the one reason I love The Dark Knight has to be the performance given by Heath Ledger, the take on The Joker at that time convinced me that it had to have been arguably the best acting that has ever beheld before me. He felt real, felt like your average joe who was tormented and abused by his drunk father…or the conflict with his wife…(or some other fabricated lie he must recreate each day to deal with his insanity). While the both may be true in a round-about way, the Joker is multidimensional and his mysterious history is what keeps you watching, hoping that some little string of dialogue could reveal his past. When the movie is over you begin to wonder if it was possible that the Joker himself is unaware of his true origins…

Christopher Nolan noted that the movie was the origin of Two-Face (Harvey Dent) as the story curve revolved around him and the rise of the Joker.

Now what about Batman? I mean the movie is about him correct? Well, sort-of, but he cannot be unspoken. The only thing I have to disagree on Christian Bale’s role as Batman is that voice he disguises his self with, however it works, but most people might have a hard time understanding him. Bruce Wayne is very multidimensional as well, with a sense of criminal justice planted deep into his heart after the death of his parents, but will not kill unless absolutely necessary believing all men deserve a trial and to kill makes him no better than his enemies.
This was reflected greater than I had seen before in The Dark Knight when he was presented with the chance to end the Joker’s reign forever, but saved him, showing his true compassion and moral personality.

The interpersonal relationship between The Joker and Batman is unlike any and Christopher Nolan went above and beyond with his take on the rich mythology of the DC Comics superhero. With The Dark Knight Rises coming to the theaters July 20th of this year I am among those will be sitting in front of that Imax screen with complete faith that Christopher Nolan’s last installment was taken with great care (as he always has) and will most likely enjoy that as much as The Dark Knight…

Re:Blogged- Monster

I don’t usually like poems, I have never been good at them and nothing I really became fully involved in. My friend Hamuu who happens to not only work beside be in the same cubicle, but also owns a blog of his very own (which if you were to find out we might me the only ones in the entire facility). I read what he titled as “Monster” and I found myself in his work of poetry, it reminded me of what I had to go through (in certain period of my life that I will not reveal) and almost  perfectly represented what I felt like at that time.
In a therapeutic attempt to release the internal torment I embodied it into my story and helped form the main character of my book. (…movie…screenplay…I don’t know anymore…)

Now there’s two.

Anyway, enjoy this great poem by my equally great friend.

...Trapped in a body I no longer own...

Monster

by Dustin Reed

Everyone has a monster that lurks inside,
A creature with a dark design.
If let loose, my greatest fear,
Would harm all those I hold dear.
Consuming pain with every breath,
To give in would mean my death.
So tired and beaten I fight on.
It must not claim me as its pawn.

But on this field devoid of light,
Can I win an endless fight?
Against the nameless sorrow and hate,
Is loss my only fate?
Confronted with this doubt I slip,
I start to feel the monsters icy grip.
My heart grows cold; my soul to fire,
For a moment I entertain a dark desire.

Emotions fade and turn to stone,
As my body becomes the creature’s home.
With my hand he reaches out,
I protest and I shout.
But listen he does not
For I am the prize the monster has sought.
Now trapped in a body no longer my own,
I am helpless and alone.

Ask and I Shall Post

I will be updating the site with a new page titled “The Man Behind The Blog”, a short biography of what makes me who I am as a Blogger/Writer. Even though I can be completely content with managing it all by myself, I feel that haven’t taken the time to ask my fellow bloggers and followers what they have in mind.

So I ask all of the WordPress community: what would you like to know about me?
It can be anything–anything at all whether it’s random, personal, or just plain unusual.

“What is your favorite morning cereal?”
“What would you like to do on the last day of your life?”
“Why was there a turkey in your room today?”

You can ask what ever your curiosity fancies at the moment.

Everything will be confidential…to some extent.

Send me an Email or Follow me on Twitter: AnthonyAAE@gmail.com/TheMarnray @ Twitter

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