Posts Tagged ‘ Humor ’

30 Day Challenge: Day 13

It’s finally the 1st of November and due to severe mishaps and roadblocks (Internet failure, moving, and inevitable procrastination) the 30 Day Challenge has been reduced to a set pattern of ideas to use to keep the heartbeat of my blog at a steady pace. Regardless I’m writing, which right now kinda surprises even me since my novel is in production.
Now I bring Day 13: My Opinion About my Body and How Comfortable I am With It.

The subject has been met with mixed reactions within myself. For now lets just say…

I’M SEXY AND I KNOW IT.

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30 Day Challenge: Day 12

Day Twelve: Five Guys Whom I Find Attractive.

Sorry folks, but I am Heterosexual, therefore my realm of attraction lies in those with a genetic sprouting from a X chromosome. So here are Five Girls Whom I Find Attractive.

  1. Zooey Deschanel – Every time I see her in a movie I have to strategically turn myself a few degrees from whoever is in the room.
  2. Scarlett Johansson – The Avengers. Need I say more?
  3. Lily Collins – Standing ovation to Phill.
  4. Emma Stone – You knew there was a 99% chance she would be on this list
  5. Some Girl I Fail to Remember at the Moment– And I won’t try to guess…

30 Day Challenge: Day 8

For Day Eight of the challenge, I am to write down What I Ate Today.

Well, I’ll start off by saying that no one reads a good post at ten in the evening (Yes, I’m giving that weird stare at you good citizen) so I decided it would be best to write what I devoured yesterday.

I began the day right with my usual combination of eggs and bacon, casually mixed within an omelette like shape (or what I tried to shape as an omelette) and a glass of milk. I call it a power combo, only because they say it’s good for my daily workout.
Mid Day arrives and I break the dieting rule by purchasing a 44oz. soda from a convenience store. (*hides head in shame*) Nothing was stuffed into my pie-hole until later in the night when I was kindly invited by my best friend for dinner at his place, serving spaghetti and a little…”extra”.

30 Day Challenge: Day 7

Day seven has come around and now I get to list Five Pet Peeves.

There are many things that absolutely boil my blood. Things I wish I could eradicate from the face of this planet (or wipe from human minds). As much as I may hate them, the only thing I can do is complain about them.

  1. Eating with Your Mouth Open/Making Noise while Eating– If you want to send shivers down my spine, please don’t hesitate in performing these two actions. Manners people, manners.
  2. Not Meaning What You Say– If you say anything, make sure you mean it with everything you have inside you. If you didn’t the first time, you probably shouldn’t have said it at all.
  3. Stupidity– Need I say more? Grow a brain or dig a hole; the choice is yours.
  4. Cutting Your Tongue on Jolly Ranchers– It hurts.
  5. Waking Up With Messy Hair– Come on, I have an image to maintain and I can’t do that if it looks as if gerbils have moved in the follicle jungle overnight.

30 Day Challenge: Day 4

For Day Four, the next on the challenge list is to Bullet My Whole Day.

  • I wake up at 11:05, picking up my cell phone to check the time in a zombie-like fashion.
  • I manage to stumble to the bathroom to commence with shower.
  • *censored*
  • I find a suitable outfit to slip into that doesn’t conflict with work policies.
  • I gather my belongings for the bike ride to the occupational facility.
  • I ride my bike to said occupational facility.
  • I walk in and almost instantly, a sense of dread and depression fills my body.
  • My shift begins and I sit at my designated workstation which doubles as a prison cell.
  • I get my first call after pulling up the necessary systems to do my job “properly”.
  • My blood pressure rises as the customer yells with enough volume to rupture both eardrums.
  • (Repeat above for two hours.)
  • Break time arrives in which I walk several feet to another room simply to sit back down.
  • It’s over and the yelling continues for two more hours.
  • Lunch with Friends.
  • Back to the phone for four more hours till end of jail sentence.
  • I hop back on my dual-wheeled transportation device and peddle my way back home while listening to relaxing Skrillex.
  • I arrive and crash onto my bed. Then I turn on my Xbox to kill Covenant forces in therapeutic relaxation.

That’s my day. My week on repeat.

Time for Virtual Party Hats V5; One Lovely Blog Nomination!

Here we are once again to celebrate the greatest moments of my blog’s history; looking back at all the tears, blood, sweet, and Bengay used to craft such a blog of incredulousness. This time the party welcomes the news of its second award from another blog, My Two Caps. The blog carries a lot of great posts pertaining to the vast realm of virtual reality and the geekhood we so proudly engage in.
I sincerely thank you for such an honor and since the nomination was granted due to the earlier posts I made about gaming, Better With A Pen shall continue on with the game related news, reviews, and sneak peeks. The news shall also continue on the brother site Gaming The Systems, so don’t fret my dears.

One Lovely Blog Award

In part of accepting such award there are some rules that follow:

  • Thank the person who nominated you and link back to them in your post.
  • Share 7 things about yourself. (Keep in mind that children may read this)
  • Nominate 15 bloggers you absolutely relish.
  • Leave a comment on each of these blogs letting them know they’ve been nominated.

So now that the rules are acknowledged, I must acknowledge them myself. 7 little known facts:

  1. I have written an entire novel in my youth, deciding that it would serve a greater purpose as kindling than a readable piece of material.
  2. I’m very outspoken and I don’t let anything stop me from speaking my mind, which gives others the impression that I am an insensitive pompous jerk.
  3. I like to reenact Brian Regan’s standup routines, having the uncanny ability to replicate his voice. (As much as someone doesn’t like it…)
  4. I have never been able to successfully write a poem, as each 15-word heartfelt letter becomes a 15-page heartfelt letter.
  5. I dress like a hipster, but remain classy and suave.
  6. I’m crazily, insanely in love with someone right now, so I thought I should tell the world.
  7. I still enjoy drawing my StickMan Adventures comic series I began in my year at Puerto Rico. It now happens to be on it’s 10th season.

Now here are the 15 blogs that I would like to nominate for this meritorious award:

So, go on to check these great blogs out. Maybe even read a bit. It’s healthy.
Let the party commence!

funny gifs

Internet Friends: Chapter Two

The orthogonal room Kathy occupied for hours began to induce a degree of Cabin Fever. She used the excuse of possessing a sore body to justify the lacking desire to part from the enticing comfort of the bed.  The adventure her and AJ endured was enough to make anyone not want to move either, but the mysterious origin of the discovery they made had a magnetic attachment. They both wanted to go back, regardless of how dangerous the situation could be and as much as AJ advised against visiting again, Kathy felt a strange need.
A knock on her bedroom door initiated a groan as she forced herself to her feet. AJ stood before her holding flowers and a box of her favorite candy.
“Good morning honey.”
AJ and Kathy locked lips and held each other for a few seconds. It lasted longer than usual and as much as she was enthralled by the surprise, she was also concerned.
“Sunflowers…on a Tuesday morning? What’s going on?”
AJ chuckled. “What makes you think that theres something wrong?”
Kathy gave him a look that explained everything. AJ sighed and sat beside her on the bed.
“Im leaving. I don’t know for how long, but it may be for a week. The team decided that going to Washington DC is for the best.” AJ said solemnly.
Kathy looked down in a depressing manner beginning to imagine some unfortunate event that she could create to keep him here. AJ lifted her head by the chin and kissed her. “I love you babe, but this is what the Debate Team has always wanted to do. It’s not like im not coming back.”
“I know.” Kathy chuckled. “I know.  I hope you have a great time.”
“I hope so too.”
AJ left the room with Kathy in his arms and the two made their way to the high school.

Aurobindo High was one of the more hostile educational establishments in the state-wide area, it crawled with cyber-bullies and all forms of technological terrorists who loved to “troll”. The school’s system and how it functioned revolved around modern devices and the accessibility of the internet, one of the first to become a fully paperless environment and replaced everything with computer interfaces. It was Kathy’s sanctuary amid all of the conflict.
AJ hauled the two suitcases onto the bus, completely unaware that the entire space allocated for luggage was to it’s capacity. AJ cursed silently and handed them back to Kathy for her to set them aside.
“Wow. I can’t believe it, no room at all. I figured maybe they would get a bus big enough for 13 people.” AJ said bothered by the fact the back of the small yellow vehicle was full to the ceiling with luggage of assorted colors.
“You could set them in the walkway.” Kathy said, trying her best to offer her services of wisdom, but AJ refused every one and continued to fret over the lack of preparation. “It’s going to be fine. Someone will come and make room.”
AJ sighed in agitation. “The bus can explode for all I care. Then they’ll be room.”

Suddenly a bright flash blinded the couple, shrapnel from the bus flew out of the fireball that engulfed the transport vehicle hitting AJ in the arm. He fell to the ground, clutching the fresh slash in his limb. The searing heat from the explosion injected more pain as he groaned in agony.
“What the hell!?” Kathy exclaimed in shock. “What did you do?”
“Me? Why would I do that? …It…was only a wish.”
Kathy shook her head in bewilderment while AJ googled at the flaming remains of the bus.
“Do I have superpowers?” 

The ride to the hospital lasted longer than usual, enough time for AJ and Kathy to analyze every little detail of the incident. It didn’t make sense to any of them to how a simple joke instantly manifested into reality.
“Do you think it was some kind of murder plot?” AJ concluded.
“Who would want to murder you though?”
“I don’t know. I don’t know anyone who would hate me passionately enough to kill me.”
Kathy ran through the numbers in her head. She knew AJ wasn’t the most liked person at the school and she only knew of one person who would attempt to challenge his mortality. “Dean. What about him?”
AJ pondered the name, but no viable reason surfaced to what could be behind Dean’s motivation in wanting to end his life. “I couldnt tell you. It may be, but we need to find more clues.”
“Like this?” Kathy said as she handed her phone to AJ. A text message stretched across the screen reading,

Enjoy the show kids?
We don’t like killing off younglings such as yourselves, but the secret of the Citadel will not be placed in the hands of those who’s comprehention of power exceeds what can be understood. Or controlled.
Do not begin to question the seriousness of my intentions, you two hold a secret greater than you realize.
We plan to take it back.

A cold chill ran down AJ’s back. “They tried to kill me.”
“It has to do with that room we found. The Citadel was mentioned in that one note too.”
“Yeah, so? I still want to know what this secret is that is so dang important. We didn’t even steal anything, all we did was read the note.”
“And found out that who ever was in there before us spied on hundreds of people…and what happened to him.”
AJ shot a look of shock at Kathy. “How much information did you uncover?”
“Just that. The history of the guy who was there before and nothing else. Apparently he was part of the Interweb Reformery and was trying to reverse some effect that changed the world. He researched everything he could about the internet and discovered what he called a “Matrix Backdrop” which supposedly has to be part of the secret he was…deleted for.” Kathy said to her best knowledge.
“Deleted?”
Kathy nodded with a gulp.
AJ stared off into the black asphalt of the road they traveled on, baffled at the ludicrous news that entered his ears. The “D” word rang in his head like a painful memory. AJ only heard of the word being used in that same manner once before, mostly in urban legends of people that dissapear without any trace left behind, and no suspect to blame for it. His gut wrenched in worry that he was now completely exposed to death’s touch, not only him but Kathy as well; the love of his life now in the same danger as he. The risk of him losing her was not an option and he vowed at that moment that he would fight against that fate that was inching nearer in his mind. He wondered if Kathy felt the same, realizing that he now had not only her life in his hands, but the entire world as well. 

                                                                      ************

The night passed by with several mixed feelings stirring inside of the two. There was no telling what each one felt at any given moment due to the extreme nature of their situation. AJ waited for his insides to turn upside down to expel his lunch for relief, including the desperate need for asprin for the patchwork from his wound, and Kathy wished that she would’ve been born with the personality of dumb blonde. The two sat on the porch of Kathy’s apartment, looking up at the stars in a conscience despair for answers.
“I feel as if this is my fault.”
“Nonsense.” AJ said defensively. “It’s us. We did this.”
Kathy buried her face in her hands and began to cry. AJ moved her arm toward him and placed his hand in hers, clasping them together. “We will get through this. It’s going to be hard, but nothing impossible.”
Kathy smiled through the tears and huged AJ tightly. “Tomorrow, we finish this war.”